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The Journal Of


Have you thought about adopting?

Is what I WANT to say each and every time I’m asked this question {which, believe me, is way more often then it should be}.Asking an infertile mother if she’s thought about adoption is like asking a cancer patient if they’ve thought about getting a second opinion or asking a vegetarian if they’ve thought about […]

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An Open Letter to Michelob Ultra #PureGoldCEO

Dear Michelob Ultra Pure Gold CEO picker person,Yea, OK, Sure…I’m probably not the obvious choice. I’m not 22 years old, 5’10”, 120lbs, and a huge social media influencer. I don’t make my own soap, look sexy in a sweaty messy bun, or post 47 pictures a day online. I haven’t been an ‘outdoor girl’ since […]

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The Window

I found a writing exercise today that I was so completely drawn to it that I couldn’t NOT write. I was given this picture and told to ‘just write’. I immediately saw myself in the window: both AS the window and BEHIND the window. I think many of us who have lost a child {or anyone […]

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St. Joe to Nebraska City…

It was almost exactly nine years, to the day, that I made this trip the last time. I wasn’t alone last time I traveled north on I-29 from St Joseph to Nebraska City – but déjà vu crept eerily into the car until I couldn’t handle the weight of it any longer.Before 2009 I had […]

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Words You Don’t Say…

“…Well at least you didn’t ACTUALLY get to KNOW her…”I was talking to someone I see on occasion the other day. I don’t actually know her – just her name…well, and now WAY more than I ever want to…We ‘talked’ for maybe 20 minutes and in between hearing all about her family’s issues she went on […]

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Something I never thought I’d do again…

It just about gave me a panic attack. I actually had to sit down and take big, deep breaths (in through the nose, out through the mouth)…I went to back to the fertility clinic. Not because I need their services but because the doctor I followed around the country is back in Kansas City and […]

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